The latest Phil Evans column – November 06

Comedian Phil Evans is from Ammanford. He is known as the man who puts the ‘cwtsh’ into comedy. Website - www.philevans.co.uk

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HOW TO REACT TO A NON-REACTOR…

People are funny. I’m not talking ‘funny’ as in ‘they make me laugh’ funny. I’m referring to people’s quirks when they inter-act (or very often don’t) with other people in a normal everyday conversation.

As tolerant as you are, I bet you’ve been annoyed by people whose behaviour made you promise to never spend another moment in their company.

A friend of mine recently asked me if I knew what a ‘Non-Reactor’ was.

I didn’t, but as soon as he explained what he meant, I knew exactly what he was talking about. 

A veteran writer and long-time observer of human behaviour, he explained a ‘Non-Reactor’ is someone so wrapped up in themselves they’re incapable of reacting to anything you tell them with a polite “That’s very interesting” or “How awful for you!”

“Tell me more!” is, naturally, not in their vocabulary.

Instead, the second you stop talking, they jump in with a (usually unrelated) story of their own, giving the impression they haven’t absorbed what you’ve just told them. 

Your words are like bullets bouncing off Superman’s chest. 

And the ‘Non-Reactor’ maintains this throughout what is less a conversation than a contest on their part, to tell the most interesting story.

A funny example of a celebrity ‘Non-Reactor’ concerns Sir Christopher Lee.

A man not known for hiding his light under a bushel, shall we say…

Attending a weekend pro-am golf tournament, his ‘Non-Reaction’ to other people’s stories was to immediately relate them to his own career.

This annoyed all the other players, including Jimmy Tarbuck and Kenny Lynch, who tried to think up a story that Mr. Lee couldn’t possibly relate to himself.

On the Sunday morning, Jimmy and Kenny were having breakfast in the hotel when Kenny suddenly said, “I know how we can get him!”  

As Mr. Lee joined them at the table, Kenny pretended to be engrossed in his newspaper and exclaimed, “Look at this, Tarby! They’ve found Adolf Hitler alive in the Bolivian jungle!”

Without missing a beat, Mr. Lee said: “I was asked to play Hitler in a film!”

Kenny and Tarby’s response is, sadly, not on record!

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Remembrance Sunday

As I sit down to write this week’s column, I feel an overwhelming urge to reflect on Remembrance Sunday, a day that resonates deeply for countless individuals across the United Kingdom and the Commonwealth. 

This solemn occasion serves as a poignant reminder of the sacrifices made by British and Commonwealth military and civilian servicemen and women during the two World Wars and subsequent conflicts, a tribute to courage and resilience that transcends generations.

Some time back, I delved into the significance of the poppy, a symbol that carries profound meaning. 

To my surprise, I learned that it was inspired by the haunting lines of the World War One poem ‘In Flanders Fields’.

The opening lines evoke a powerful image of vibrant red poppies flourishing amidst the devastated landscapes of soldiers' graves in Flanders, a region in Belgium that bore witness to unimaginable loss. 

These delicate flowers, emerging from the churned earth, stand as a testament to life persisting in the face of death a poignant reminder that even amidst despair, hope can blossom.

Remembrance Sunday is not just a date on the calendar; it is a sacred moment to honour those who have given their all for our freedoms. 

It invites us to pause and reflect on the heavy price paid for our choices and the liberty to express our thoughts. 

It is a day to acknowledge that our voices, including mine (with the editor's approval, of course!), are the result of countless sacrifices made by brave souls who believed in a future where freedom reigns.

As we gather to remember, let us carry forward the legacy of those who served, ensuring that their stories and sacrifices are never forgotten.

This day, and the symbol of the poppy, implore us to honour their memory with gratitude and resolve.

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You can follow Phil Evans on Twitter @philevanswales and  www.philevans.co.uk