The latest Phil Evans column from the South Wales Evening Post

The latest Phil Evans column from the South Wales Evening Post.
Comedian Phil Evans is from Ammanford. He is known as the man who puts the ‘cwtsh’ into comedy.


Are the rules meant to be broken?
I'm nothing special - in fact I'm a bit of a bore.
If I tell a joke, you've probably heard it before.
Some of you might be forgiven for thinking, “Phil’s just written a goodbye note to his career as a stand-up”.”
While the more musically-minded among you will have recognised the lyrics of “Thank You For The Music” and be thinking “Phil’s not only leaving comedy . . . he’s joining an ABBA tribute band!”
You’re all wide of the mark.
I’ve quoted Benny and Bjorn’s words because, while I’ve never thought of myself as anything special, I’ve noticed there are many people around today who believe they’re so special that the laws and rules that we’re supposed to abide by don’t actually apply to them.
I’m referring to . . .
Drivers who blithely ignore speed restrictions on motorways.
Motorists and cyclists who think a red traffic light means they alone can proceed while everyone must come to a halt.
And passengers sitting in the Quiet Carriage of Inter City trains - where mobile ‘phones and personal stereos are ‘verboten’ – who ‘must’ leave their mobiles on because they’re so important.
Isn’t it amazing that industry and the business world managed to survive before the invention of mobile phones?
When their ‘phone inevitably rings – and I guarantee their annoyingly ‘quirky’ ring tone will always be eardrum shatteringly loud - they leap out of their seats and head to the vestibule between carriages shouting into the ‘phone, “Hang on a minute John/Garry/Marcus . . . I’m in the Quiet Carriage!” while the rest of us seethe, “Well it was quiet until now, you thoughtless twonk!”
There’s more . . .
This is taken from a Government website -
It’s illegal to ride a motorcycle or drive using hand-held phones or similar devices.
The statement couldn’t be clearer.
Yet we see people ignore it every day.
These motoring morons regard themselves as above the Law - the modern-day equivalent of Wild West gunslingers.
But, whereas many outlaws died at High Noon, idiotic iPhone imbeciles could be destined to die at High Speed while making ‘vitally important’ phone calls (“See the match last night?”) or sending ‘urgent’ texts (“C.U. down the pub later”).
I’m fascinated by the thought processes of these individuals – if indeed they’re capable of processing thoughts.
While aware they’re breaking the law, they go ahead anyway because they believe the usual rules don’t apply to them.
Is this arrogance or ignorance?
It’s no good asking me.
I’m nothing special . . .


Welsh Factor:
It’s that exciting time of year again.
Last week saw the new heats of the Welsh Factor talent competition, kicking off with an amazing turnout at Pontardawe Leisure Centre.
The venue was filled with new and fresh talent who were determined to make their mark and get through to the next round.
It was refreshing to see new faces on the scene and an act that really stood out and impressed me was a singing act which was made up of three sisters from Gorseinon, the Romanello Sisters.
Their voices complimented each other beautifully, their harmonies were magical and their audition seemed to mesmerise the judges.
True home grown local talent, which is exactly what the judges were looking for.
I have a feeling that this year will be another ground-breaking and career-changing experience for so many up-and-coming talented youngsters from this part of Wales.
There are so many gifted acts out there waiting to shine. We really are spoilt for choice in this part of the world.


The Shires:
Last Friday night, I had the perfect end to a very busy and stressful week, when I joined a few friends at the Lyric Theatre in Carmarthen to see The Shires.
The Shires are an English Country Pop duo, Ben Earle and Crissie Rhodes who were formed in 2013, playing a stunning set of original songs that they had written after inspirational trips to Nashville, resulting in collaboration with some of the top names in Country Music.
This was country music with a difference, with such a young band behind them they were engaging from the off.
It was lovely to see performers who are so passionate and talented at what they do.
The audience were not sitting in their seats for long once this show started, with everyone up on their feet dancing and clapping.
This was their first gig in Wales.
TV and radio has talked about their work for some time now and we were thrilled to be able to catch them live at last.
If you love music and live entertainment you have to check them out.
If you want a ‘sample, then they were on the Graham Norton Show with Robert De Niro on Friday night. I am sure you can catch it again on the BBC iPlayer ‘thingy’ on the interweb!


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