The latest Phil Evans column from the South Wales Evening Post
Comedian Phil Evans is from Ammanford. He is known as the man who puts the ‘cwtsh’ into comedy
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Ever had two different thoughts on one day and then realised they’re connected? Please say ‘Yes’ or we’ll get nowhere with this.
I was thinking about celebrities whose names are, despite their fame, often incorrectly spelt in newspapers and magazines.
If you’re a fan of Judy Dench....Shane Ritchie....Matt Munroe...Cliff Richards... or... Brian “It’s A Puppet!” Connolly, you’ll realise I deliberately misspelled their names – but that’s how I’ve seen them spelt in print many times.
For the record, here’s the correct spelling(s) - Judi, Richie, Monro, Richard and Conley.
The L.A. Times has dropped the second ‘t’ in veteran American actor Elliott Gould’s first name on no less that 47 occasions. His agent complains, but it keeps happening.
Edgar Allan Poe’s middle name is invariably spelt ’Allen’ in the ‘papers. Obviously there’s no point in his agent tapping at the editor’s chamber door....
These mistakes aren’t confined to print. James Bolam was being interviewed on Breakfast TV and the on-screen caption spelt his name ‘Bollom’.
It was corrected after a couple of minutes, but how does a mistake like this happen? The man’s been a star for over 45 years!
Then, at the weekend, the BBC Sport website made a blunder with Scarlets and Wales lock forward Jake Ball’s name. Adding the word ‘sack’ after his surname was plainly somebody ‘trying to have a laugh’. Not very funny, in my book. Some heads should roll at the Beeb. Let’s hope Jake saw the funny side, as he’s such a big lad I wouldn’t want to cross him!
I get angry at what you might consider a trivial matter because these mistakes are a result of sloppy research, no research or plain ignorance. If you’re happy to accept information that’s based on such shaky ground, so be it.
My second thought was about the song “If I Never Sang Another Song” which has been recorded by many people, including Matt Munroe.
No, I’m messing with you. Matt Monro.
See how my two thoughts were connected?
Anyway, the song contains this line “I was the celebrity celebrities would die to meet”.
The song, the confession of a once-famous singing star that he doesn’t miss his glory days, is especially poignant when you hear Matt Monro’s recording.
When Don Black wrote those lyrics back in the 1970’s, celebrities really were celebrities who’d worked hard over many years to reach the very top of the pile as singers, actors/actresses, comedians, musicians, etc.
Frank Sinatra, Bob Hope, Danny Kaye, Burt Lancaster, John Wayne, Fred Astaire, Henry Fonda, James Stewart and many other ‘greats’ were still alive and working. When one of them appeared on “Parkinson” it was an event!
Today, anyone willing to sit around in a house full of cameras with a bunch of fellow deadbeats, behaving as obnoxiously as possible, is considered to be a ‘celebrity’.
Most mercifully disappear from view within a few months, but some mysteriously manage to create a career and get their faces all over the media – even though they can’t actually do anything! They star in their own series, sometimes travelling all over the world, despite the fact they can barely string a coherent sentence together. Then they turn up in ‘celebrity’ versions of existing game and quiz shows.
It’s madness.
As is the fact newspapers have trouble spelling Dame Judi Dench’s name correctly, but have no problem with Kim Kardashian...whoever she is!
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The world of entertainment can be a lonely uphill struggle and it takes years to learn the ropes, make connections and become established. Last week I met up for coffee with my good friend Kelly Marie to catch up on the world of music and entertainment, which is something that she is extremely passionate about.
Kelly can be considered a mover and shaker in this arena, as over the past few years she has been responsible for the success of many live performers in the area.
Here we have a lady that has the ability to get things done and knows what it takes for her acts to succeed and earn a decent living from a very competitive and demanding profession.
Every performer starting out needs someone like Kelly Marie to guide them in the right direction and steer them away from the pot holes and dangers that every new performer is guaranteed to encounter.
If you are into the music scene locally, no doubt you would have seen a few of the acts that this talented lady works with. There is a downside to this story, I ended up paying for the coffee and cake, again!
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I’m in the Brangwyn Hall on November 18 with Ignacio Lopez and an up-and-coming comedian you’ll probably hear about soon called ‘Russell Kane’.
Nearly five years ago I saw Ignacio at one of his first ever gigs in the Uplands with none other than Russell Kane. It’s great to see Ignacio grow as an act, getting funnier and playing bigger shows.
Over a coffee-fuelled catch up, I reminded Ignacio of that show five years ago. He laughed, “I was only on the show because I’d offered to sell tickets! The promoter begrudgingly gave me five minutes before Russell and I had a great time, half my family was there.”
I asked what his family had thought. “They loved it, they were crying with laughter. A lot of Russell’s jokes come from growing up with really relate-able characters, that inspired me starting out. Russell’s a genuinely nice guy and his comedy comes from a good place. Like you Phil!"
Aww, flattery gets you a mention in my column!
Good influences in stand-up are important, many try to shock or cause offense to get publicity but you just have to remember why you do comedy. Laughter is a positive thing!
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You can follow Phil Evans on Twitter @philevanswales
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