Comedian Phil Evans on why ‘stand-up’ beats the bullies
South Wales comedian Phil Evans has written this feature on the importance of standing up to bullying.
Why ‘stand-up’ beats the bullies
Cyber-bullies, playground bullies, workplace
bullies, gay-bashing bullies, celebrity bullies . . .
It appears there’s more ‘bullish’ behaviour in
society today than in many pedigree herds of cattle.
Blimey! Even the fragrant Cheryl Cole is alleged to
have been involved in a spot of bullying.
Cole was the X Factor in an alleged encounter with a
nightclub toilet attendant – possibly proving that even famous people aren’t
always on their best behaviour.
You can be rich and famous, but if you hurt,
humiliate or belittle someone less fortunate than you, you’re a bully.
And if you keep on doing it, I’ll get my seven-foot tall,
professional wrestler mate ‘The Giant Needle’ (I found him under ‘The Giant
Haystacks’) to beat you up!
Okay, I’m being ironic. Do pay attention, 007!
During our lifetimes, we’ll inevitably encounter physical
or psychological bullying.
Bosses bully staff.
Big fellahs bully small fellahs.
Ambitious workmates, male and female, bully people
they see as rivals for promotion.
Politicians and other people in high office bully us
through baffling legislation, laws, rules and punitive taxes.
So what can we do about it?
Well, most people do nothing - for one simple
reason; the fear of reprisals.
Those reprisals can take many forms - whether it’s
from the swaggering, fat-bellied, loudmouthed individual in a vest who shows
off his tattoos or from a large organisation that tries to blind us with ‘legalese’
and jargon in order to steamroller us into submission.
It’s happened to all of us - and here’s the proof.
Everyone used to get their dustbins emptied once a
week, a service we paid for out of our council tax.
Then we were asked to recycle various items like
bottles, cans, newspapers etc and given boxes of various colours in which to
place them for collection. Fair enough.
But once we started doing that regularly (some might
say we were doing the council’s job), without any consultation, we were told our
weekly collections of rubbish were suddenly changing to fortnightly.
It wasn’t up for debate. The council spoke and we
had to obey them.
And, idiots that we are, we meekly submitted to accepting
that our rubbish collections would be reduced by 50%, even though we wouldn’t
get a similar reduction in our council tax – in fact it increases every year!
What do we do about it? Absolutely nothing! We
prefer to remain the silent victims of bullying by the faceless men and women
in the Town Hall.
I won’t generalise about schools today, although we’ve
all read desperately sad stories in the newspapers about children who have been
bullied so relentlessly by their wicked classmates they saw suicide as the only
way to escape it.
When I was in school, if you happened to be slight
of build or wore glasses or looked ‘different’, the likelihood was that you
would get picked on.
When I was in school, I wasn’t what you’d call an
Arnold Schwarzenegger clone – although to be fair, whenever we broke up for the
holidays, I’d always say to my teachers
“I’ll be back!” – a remark which made me a sort of ‘End-of Term-inator’.
Looking back, I must have been a right nutter,
because I had no fear of bullies and would stand up for myself and the weaker
kids who’d been the victims of bullying.
Sometimes a bully would back down after I’d had a
few well-chosen words with him, which is what I hoped would be the outcome.
But invariably there were times when the real hard
cases didn’t like being told off and thought they could take me on . . . and they
did so.
This led to me getting into many scrapes. So many,
in fact, that when I’m asked what qualifications I left school with, my answer
is “Just the one; a Black Belt” (to hold my trousers up, of course)!
Perhaps I took that stance against bullies as a
result of my own difficult home life.
I had a violent mother and a step-father who also
turned-out to be a nasty piece of work- a bully who I couldn’t stand the sight
of. So, by the time I was 12, I had to move out and go and live with my gran.
As I matured, I continued to loathe bullies and stood
up to anyone who deliberately caused a damned nuisance.
I still do to this day. Two recent visits to the
cinema were almost ruined for me by people talking, messing about and not
showing any interest in the film they and everyone else had paid to see.
Both times I confronted them, telling them to shut
up or I’d get the film stopped and they’d be ejected. First time it was a bunch
of teenage lads, second time it was two big fellahs.
Luckily none of them retaliated, but settled down
and the audience was able to enjoy the rest of the film.
Yes I took a bit of a chance, but if I hadn’t stood
my ground, we’d have all gone home with our stomachs in a knot, wishing we’d
said something.
In the business of show in which I make what is
laughingly called a living, you come across bullies frequently.
I read recently that out of 4,000 people from the
world of media who were asked if they’d been a victim of bullying in the
workplace, an astonishing 59% said they had!
Some eight out of 10 women in the media reported instances
of lewd comments, pressure from superiors to enter into a sexual relationship
or actual sexual assault.
It beggars belief that such archaic sexist attitudes
still prevail in the workplace in 2014.
On stage or off, a comedian is always working; running
through routines in his/her head, mulling over whether a new piece which he/she
believes will get a big laugh (which is, after all, what comedians live for) might
possibly alienate a portion of the audience at the next gig.
I think this awareness of other people’s
sensitivities prevents us from becoming bullies ourselves and helps us suss out
those in powerful positions who, purely for their own amusement, love to
intimidate or humiliate others less fortunate than them.
Since the days of the court jester, it’s been the
job of the comedian to prick the balloon of pomposity and, should it be
warranted, put the great and the good who lord it over us a little bit too
smugly, in their place.
In its highest form, this sort of humour is referred
to as satire. In its lowest form, it’s called taking the p---!
If, through my comedy I can have a sharply-pointed
dig at overbearing bullies (without coming across as one myself) and make them
think maybe they should rein-in their unacceptable behaviour and start treating
people with more respect, I’m continuing the work I did back when I was a lad,
standing-up to the school bullies.
Except that, today, I stand-up on stage, with a
microphone in my hand and an audience in front of me, at a comedy gig!
About Phil Evans:
Phil Evans is sometimes known as the 'Hugmeister of
Wales' and the man who has put the 'Cwtsh' back into comedy.
He is a favourite warm-up comedian for TV shows on
BBC, S4C and ITV. He recently appeared on Sky TV’s The Welsh Show. He regularly
performs overseas and recent trips have taken him to the USA, Canada and
Norway.
Squeeze him for information on his favourite topic –
the Welsh cwtsh (hug) – and he will explain why a cwtsh should always be spelt
as ‘cwtsh’ and not ‘cwtch’.
Cheeky, but never crude or offensive, Evans produces
a very Welsh brand of humour.
Website -
Comments