The latest Phil Evans column from the South Wales Evening Post

The latest Phil Evans column from the South Wales Evening Post.
Comedian Phil Evans is from Ammanford. He is known as the man who puts the ‘cwtsh’ into comedy.
www.philevans.co.uk

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DUCKED A HECKLE AND MISSED A JIBE
It took years before I enjoyed being on stage, without dreading I wouldn’t get any laughs.
I still don’t take audiences for granted, because they can cause even the most experienced comedian to have an off-night.
In his review of a recent stage show starring comedian Kevin Bridges, Brian Ferguson, of The Scotsman, stated...
“...the audience was the worst-behaved I had witnessed in 25 years of attending events. I was actually amazed Bridges did not walk off in disgust well before he hastily wrapped up his show.”
Bridges, who is no shrinking violet when it comes to silencing a heckler with a pithy put-down, was constantly interrupted by individuals who presumably thought (wrongly) they were funnier than the man they’d paid good money to see.
Their selfish behaviour ruined the evening for Bridges and the audience.
You might expect persistent hecklers in a comedy club or a ‘room-over-a-pub’ gig, but this was the prestigious 3,000-seater Edinburgh Playhouse!
While I don’t feel nostalgic for the ‘good old days’ when comedians wore suits and ties - or even a tuxedo – on stage, I realise why they changed from street clothes into expensive stage suits and would never consider swearing on stage.
It was a mark of respect to their audience, who expected them to look and behave like the ‘larger than life’ stars they were.
Before a gig, I invariably make a point of changing out of the clothes I creased on the car journey, even if it’s only into a clean shirt and trousers.
That’s why dressing rooms are called ‘dressing rooms’ and not ‘texting, breaking-wind and moaning-about-the-fee’ rooms.
But, when ‘Alternative Comedy’ arrived, ‘gags were replaced by ‘observations’ and suits were replaced by T-shirts and jeans, breaking down the ‘them and us ‘barrier between the audience and the performer.
Let me offer this theory...
Perhaps modern comedy audiences mistakenly think that, because they’re watching a stand-up who dresses and swears just like them, they’ve got carte blanche to be abusive and obnoxious during his act.
The comedian/comedienne is expected to take it on the chin....”Because comedians love hecklers!”
Let’s knock that myth right out into the stratosphere where it belongs.
We love hecklers about as much as they’d love someone standing over them where they worked – office, factory or shop - constantly shouting out “You’re rubbish, mate!”
Next time you feel like heckling a comedian, you might want to bear that in mind...

P.S. In case you didn’t ‘get’ the heading DUCKED A HECKLE AND MISSED A JIBE, it’s a riff on DR JEKYLL AND MISTER HYDE.

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Christmas Decorations:
Ok, I’ve seen it all now!
Christmas decorations going up in November.
I thought Easter eggs in Tesco on Boxing Day was bad enough.
Are we all going mad?
Good Lord, you’ve only just taken the Halloween decorations down!
Why not just put ALL of your Happy Birthday, Easter, Halloween and Christmas decorations up on January 1 and just leave the whole lot there all year?
I witnessed a rather elderly chap in Morriston, up a very wobbly looking ladder, balancing a gigantic inflatable reindeer in one hand.
He was clinging on for dear life with the other, while his wife stood in the garden below in the pouring rain shouting “left a bit, right a bit....”
What worried me more is that they were both soaked already and she was holding the plug!
A few gusts of wintery Welsh wind and I’m sure we are going to see Rudolph taking off across Wales, so keep a look out for him flying over a town near you any day soon!

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Remembrance Sunday:
While writing this week’s column, I felt a strong urge to mention Remembrance Sunday, an event that has meaning for so many and is held in the United Kingdom and the Commonwealth as a day to commemorate the contribution of British and Commonwealth military and civilian servicemen and women in the two World Wars and later conflicts.
I have only recently discovered the significance of the poppy, which to my surprise was inspired by the World War One poem "In Flanders Fields".
I read that the opening lines refer to the many poppies that were the first flowers to grow in the churned-up earth of soldiers' graves in Flanders, a region of Europe that overlies a part of Belgium.
This is truly a day to remember and one we should never forget.
So many have contributed and paid the ultimate price so that we have choice and freedom of speech, enabling me to share my views openly (subject to the Editor’s approval, of course!)

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You can follow Phil Evans on Twitter @philevanswales and www.philevans.co.uk